


Sincerely,  S'chn T'gai Spock

by Tassillow



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies), Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Canon Compliant, Compliant to Either Star Trek TOS or AOS, Gen, Letter, Mentioned S'chn T'gai Family, One Shot, POV Spock (Star Trek), Young Spock (Star Trek)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-06
Updated: 2020-04-06
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:55:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23517274
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tassillow/pseuds/Tassillow
Summary: I find myself uncertain how to begin a correspondence with my future self, I have no precedent for how to proceed. Mother insisted, however, that writing a letter to be opened by yourself in years to come is cathartic and of cultural importance to humans. I know little about this aspect of human culture and, as such, find myself at the mercy of believing her.-14-year-old Spock writes a letter to himself on the advice of his mother. Covering his hopes, his dreams, and his logic behind them.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 11





	Sincerely,  S'chn T'gai Spock

**Author's Note:**

> Wow, I'm on a roll, publishing my two first fics in one night after years of putting it off. Lockdown has me out here (in the house) living my best life. I wrote this one back around the new year but then left it unedited on my computer for months. Spock's POV is so fun for me to write, I tried to put a lot of my own teenage personality into him.

S'chn T'gai Spock,

I find myself uncertain how to begin a correspondence with my future self, I have no precedent for how to proceed. Mother insisted, however, that writing a letter to be opened by yourself in years to come is cathartic and of cultural importance to humans. I know little about this aspect of human culture and, as such, find myself at the mercy of believing her.

When Mother first suggested the concept I informed her that the practice would be obsolete. As a Vulcan, our memories are far superior to a human’s, I am unlikely to forget anything of import. She, however, insisted that referring back to memories in the future would colour them with how I ‘feel’ at the time. My argument that Vulcans do not ‘feel’ appeared to be ignored.

When I informed her a few weeks later, after reading a selection of neuroscience papers regarding the concept of memory, that I intended to give her suggestion a try she seemed pleased. She proceeded to procure these sheets of paper and a pen for me. Such things are exceedingly rare on Vulcan nowadays. As a human, she has often expressed a preference for physical over digital. She also insisted it better to not be able to erase any of the words. I find myself unimpressed with the ordeal, my predisposition for L'tak Terai and lack of practice writing is leading to a legible but unattractive result.

It is curious how reticent I found myself to mention L'tak Terai here. I will of course still be aware of it in years to come, there should be no reason to hide it. Regardless, I expect I should be writing down more than my thought process in this letter.

I am currently 14 years old and continue studying at the learning institute. I spend the majority of my time in our home on Vulcan. Father is due another trip in three weeks time, I am eager to accompany him. The learning institute does not allow for much practical application of taught material, it focuses on the theoretical. This is with the assumption that individuals will go on to specialise in further education or the workplace. I find this method personally dissatisfying, surely practical experience would be beneficial to deepening my understanding? I informed Father of this conclusion and, seeing the logic in my statements, he has agreed to take me with him on his next trip.

I have travelled through space before and visited more planets than most my age, but I have never had much freedom on these trips. I have mostly been confined to quarters, carrying out Vulcan lessons. Mother will of course occasionally decide to ‘expand my cultural horizon’ but even this has been limited. I have not yet seen the bridge of a spaceship or even engineering, quickly escorted away while my Father gets the tour. This time I expect it to be different.

Aside from my studies little else occurs in my life. I spend time reading, drawing and playing the lute. The latter two of these activities are mostly to please mother, she is a large proponent of creativity. I have no pets or close peers to spend time with. I find myself noting the absences of Michael and Sybok more frequently than I should after this amount of time. I do see T’Pring once a month, as is expected of me, but we do not revel in our time together. Young Vulcans are supposed to use this time to explore their bond with one another and become a marital unit. We find ourselves mostly sitting in silence, reading, or occasionally exchanging details about our recent grades. She is a logical match for me and I do not dislike her presence, I suppose this is what marriage is.

Love is, of course, an emotion I do not experience. There does not however seem to be an alternative reason for why we, as a species, pair with only one specific individual. If I was designing a logical species surely it would make more sense for us to be polyamorous, the benefits of multiple partners should theoretically outway only one. Maybe it is simply a relic of Pre-Surakian times. When I asked Father about this he informed me I was not old enough yet to consider all variables. This answer was very vague and most dissatisfying.

I intend to open this letter in 10 years, I will put it out of my mind until then. I expect the specific wording of this letter will have had a chance to be forgotten and my life will be sufficiently different for me to be ‘surprised’. I will be 24 when I next read this, an adult in my own right, I find it easy to imagine. By then I will be in the Vulcan Science Academy, as has always been my goal. My grades are more than sufficient so there cannot be a chance that I do not attend. If I manage to keep up my pace of learning I may have even graduated by this point and begun a role on a science vessel.

I am uncertain yet as to what I wish to specialise in. Medical sciences are interesting but do not leave much in the way for discovery, and dealing with such volumes of people day by day seems somewhat unpleasant. Biological research seems to have more merit but I find myself pulled by the nature of physics as well. It should be Vulcan nature to want to specialise, more good can be done for the community by those who focus on only one field. I will have more than sufficient knowledge of all other areas to survive. I expect it will come to me, I must have a clear decision by the time of my application.

I should be living alone by the time I read this, maybe in the assigned academy living quarters. I will still see my parents regularly but will be responsible for my own wellbeing. I keep reminding Mother I’m already completely capable of being self-sufficient but she, for some reason, refuses to agree with me. As a human, she has made great strides in the acceptance of logic but some cultural divides seem impossible to overcome.

I have more trouble predicting my interpersonal relationships. I doubt myself and Michael will have reconnected by that point, our animosity towards one another is beyond repair. Mother tells me she joined Starfleet, a logical second choice of an educational institution. This is unfortunate as I would like to visit earth, I doubt this would be possible without seeing or hearing of one another. T’Pring and I will not be fully married until far later in life, so we can pursue education and knowledge before having children. I wonder if we will be seeing each other as much as we do now? If I am stationed on a starship, visits back to Vulcan will be infrequent. I do not know what she intends to do as an adult. If we have similar goals the academy or any Vulcan vessel will likely station the two of us together, as is common practice.

Once I am older I hope my circle of acquaintances will be less hostile. The children in the learning institute have never accepted me as a Vulcan, but they should have matured out of such childish prejudices once we are adults. My peers and colleagues have to respect me as an equal by then, I will have proven myself. ‘Friendship’, as my mother describes it, doesn’t appear to be present on Vulcan. I should, however, like to know others so we can share time carrying out productive activities. Michael, I-Chaya and I used to spend hours together studying or playing chess. I imagine this is what I will spend my time doing as an adult so long as I can find someone to join me.

There is practically nothing else for me to write, I believe I have covered all the categories my mother suggested I should think about. There is no way to know the fruitfulness of this exercise until I unseal the envelope in years to come, a very long term experiment indeed. I do feel somewhat calmer after the writing process, perhaps this is why Humans require activities like these to function at optimum.

Maybe, in the future, I will partake in a letter again.

Live Long and Prosper,

Sincerely,

S'chn T'gai Spock

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed! I don't have a beta reader so please feel free to point out any mistakes. Please chat to me about anything else in the comments as well, they're always welcome!


End file.
